jurisffiction:

iso-gale:

jurisffiction:

well it’s hard. in my defence, it’s difficult

just like spelling defense apparently!! /j

silmaspens:

Hey kiddos here’s some unfinished takes on @arlenianchronicles dtiys :)

anatoly-kun:

“… The detailed documentation about my alleged frauds. How did Egmund come by it? Who forged it? Not him, of course. You did, Ferrant.”

“I had nothing to do with it. I assure you—”

“You’re a rotten liar for a guardian of the law. It’s a mystery how you landed your position.”

Ferrant de Lettenhove pursed his lips.

“I had to,” he said. “I was carrying out orders.”

The Witcher looked long and hard at him.

“You wouldn’t believe how many times I’ve heard similar words,” he finally said. “But it’s comforting to think it was usually from the mouths of men who were about to hang.”

— Andrzej Sapkowski. Season of Storms

star-trek-dumb-comics:

Star Trek - Strange New Dumb Comics #58

Spock and Bones ! It’s been a while

(from a texpost by @trek-tracks )

contagiousrhythminmybrain:

Wen Zhuliu + knowing what’s up but deciding doing anything about it would be well above his pay grade

red-mercer:

rongzhi:

A mother bamboo rat (竹鼠) and child

Hamster in the front, opossum in the rear. Fkn incredible

zetsubonna:

infernalpume:

a-trashcan-made-out-of-fandoms:

captsiimba:

the-catholic-geek:

tgmember:

just-shower-thoughts:

It is an unspoken rule that if a little kid is hiding under a blanket or couch cushions, you are required to comment on how lumpy the blanket is and pretend to sit on it to try and “smooth it out.”

Also, if you’re playing hide-and-seek with them, it is critical that you search every other possible (and impossible) hiding spot, all the while wondering out loud how they managed to disappear just like magic, before walking right past their hiding spot.

And if a baby starts playing peekaboo you are required to act surprised when they show their face again

If a kid hands you a phone, you answer it

If a kid shoots you with a Nerf Gun you are supposed to Die a dramatic death and explain “ugh you shot me blaahh”

when you push a kid on the swings ya gotta do the woosh

I literally just blocked about a dozen people on this post for being cranky about children.

Being a joyless shitbeast to kids isn’t cool. They’re kids. If you want to be Oscar the Grouch, that’s fine, but do it in a way they understand and explain it to them.

“I don’t want to play, I’m grumpy. Thank you, though, that was kind.”

It’s literally not hard. Kids are small people. Treat them with common fucking decency.

shortgremlinman:

stepdadjesus:

bismuthcladbattleship:

musicprincess655:

doughfox:

exhausted-trashgoddex:

when it takes you a while to process what someone is saying and you realize they asked you a question

I cannot fucking believe I am drunk, past midnight, and tumblr is throwing fucking saturated fatty-acids at me

Listen here friendo I didn’t sit through a year of organic chemistry for you to come into my house and call a carboxylic acid a saturated fatty acid you respect that hexadecanoic acid

And I didnt get a degree in biochemistry to hear you say that carboxylic acids with aliphatic chains arent fatty acids. That hexadecanoic acid IS a saturated fatty acid!

And I don’t know what the fuck these mean

day-to-day-venti:

lazy wisp pile

funnytwittertweets:

how-the-feathers-have-fallen:

I hope he haunts their dreams in booty shorts, body glitter and a pride flag.